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"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.' We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others".  - Marianne Williamson

 
 
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It's important I know my "Big Why". Why do I do what I do....every day, month and year.

My big why? To provide Freedom for my family by creating wealth in character, Christ, Business, health, finances and relationships. 
Freedom is my "Big Why" Everything I do is supposed to point ahead and support my "Big Why". If I discover that my actions don't support my big why it's important I change my actions.


My big why gets me up in the morning on my worst day.  My big why brings tears to my eyes....daily. My big why keeps me going when the energy is gone and fatigue has set in. My big why will be here after I am gone.  So, what is your big why?


 
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It's been said that my comfort zone is the most dangerous place to live.  What feels safe, cozy and warm is actually my life wasting away into oblivion.  In a few hundred, hell, 50 years from now I won't be a thought in anyone's mind.  So why am I so afraid to live my life?

Forget the why! I am learning to deliberately face my fear until the fear subsides. One way I have done this is by creating two of me in my mind.  The first me is the decision maker. The guy flipping the switch.  "On or off Jason. Just make the decision." I tell myself.  The second me is the action taker.  This is the guy who has to show up to the meeting set up by the switch flipper.  It's a love hate relationship between the two.  Most of the time the action taker is terrified and is dragged along kicking a screaming.  Why is he such a big baby?

Forget the why!  We've learned not to listen to his whining.  You see, a strange thing is happening.  The more we flip the switch and take action, the more confident we become.  The more confident we become, the more we flip the switch and take action.  Brian Tracy calls this "spiraling upward."  I call it living outside of my comfort zone.  

• Plan/Do/Review

 
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My mentor told me that the team atmosphere at his company causes people to live for the work week.  His employees are not trading 5 days of work for 2 days of freedom and they long for the weekends to go by quickly so they can return to the vibrant atmosphere where they are celebrated and appreciated.

I long for that atmosphere and not from the standpoint of the employee but from the standpoint of my relationships.  I want the people in my life to feel appreciated and celebrated.  

• Plan/Do/Review

 
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This morning I met with my mentor and another mentoree at Panera.  The conversation went as it usually does, starting out with questions and answers followed by conversations stemming from the past week's events or from the questions and answers discussion.  
It was at the point the conversation shifted to family and goal setting that my mentor saw an opportunity to drill my counterpart about church attendance.  Drilling, drilling and drilling some more, my mentor asked "Do you go to church and Do you pray with your children?"  My fellow equal began stammering and our mentor, seeing blood, went in for the kill.  "You're owning it!" he exclaimed.  He then explained to us that when we defend deficiencies in our life we are owning it.  "Why would you want to own a weakness?" and "Don't defend it!" he said.  "admit your weaknesses and take action to improve your situation."  

• Plan/Do/Review

 
I am in sales in Oklahoma City.  I've worked for the same printing company for 16 years and 3 years ago I bagan a major life transformation.  The change came from my now 5 year old daughter who was born with moderate/severe asthma and severe allergies to more things than we can count.  The asthma and allergies seemed to be connected and my wife and I soon realized preservatives in the food we were feeding her contributed to the majority of her symptoms and health problems.  

The transformation came when my wife and I radically changed our diets for the benefit of our 5 year old, Grace.  We went through all of the food in our house and threw out anything and everything with ingredients we did not understand as well as those we knew affected respiratory function.  We were/are committed to only consuming minimally processed foods which are preservative free.

The result for my daughter Grace was instantaneous.  No longer did she require 1 allergy shot per week and 1 allergy pill per day but her asthma became manageable.  Two added benefits that were completely unexpected: our budget is not burdened any longer by the monthly $300 in medication and my wife and I started losing weight.  Over the course of that year my wife lost 30lbs and I lost 75lbs.  Keep in mind, we did not change our physical activity.  The weight loss was due solely to the change in our diet and aside from the addition of our 4th child, Jacob, we have kept the weight off.

Around the same time a local entrepreneur, Steven Vancauwenbergh, began feeding me books by the likes of Jim Rohn, Brian Tracy, Nepolean Hill and Stephen Covey...... Steven is now one of my closest friends.  I consumed the books with a hunger I've never known.  It was an awakening to say the least.  If you have seen the movie The Matrix starring Keanu Reeves the best way I can describe my transformation is being unplugged from the Matrix.  I will write more about this in a later post.

I have also been reaching out to those I aspire to be like. Tom Pace has been instrumental in my development.  His book, Mentor the kid and the CEO, found here mentorhope.com, is definitely worth reading.  Tom recently challenged me to go 10 days without complaining, gossiping or lying.  You can find out more about this here 3pointcommitment.org.  I'm proud to say I have gone 12 days and my new goal is 21.

Thanks to God, my wife, children, family and mentors I have matured more in the last 3 years than in all of my 37 years combined.

• Plan/Do/Review

 
Until I read The Millionaire Real Estate Agent by Gary Keller I had no idea of the difference between a functionary and a fiduciary.  According eh..hem..Wikipedia.. "In a fiduciary relationship, one person, in a position of vulnerability, justifiably vests confidence, good faith, reliance and trust in another whose aid, advice or protection is sought in some matter. In such a relation good conscience requires the fiduciary to act at all times for the sole benefit and interest of the one who trusts."  I'm reminded of this after receiving a disappointing phone call from my wife concerning my daughter and one of our employees.  The reason for my disappointment ....Imagine making Mercedes Benz payments for 6 months only to find out your driving a ford Taurus.... Now I know.... 
• Plan/Do/Review

Hope

12/18/2011

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Hope, a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen, is addictive.  Some of the things in life that give me hope are thoughts of: higher education, winning the lottery, success and wealth.  The tragedy for me has been living off of the feelings I get by hoping for certain things to happen.  My hope now rests in taking action.  Hope + inaction = addiction.


• Plan/Do/Review
 
I just finished reading True North.  In his book Bill George describes 4 styles of interdependent leadership.
  1. Engaged Leadership - Persuading the Empowered
  2. Coaching Leadership - Counseling the Receptive
  3. Consensus Leadership - Gaining Agreement with those seeking Equality
  4. Affiliative Leadership - Empathizing with those who are Team Oriented
My mentor explained to me that as I mature as a leader I will want to create interdependent relationships and graduate from, first being a leader of dependent relationships to, second being a leader of independent relationships and last of all being a leader of interdependent relationships.

Creating partnerships (interdependent relationships) is now my goal.  Now I know!

• Plan/Do/Review